Lupus

This is a topic that I have not spoken on in some time. It is one that is near and dear to my heart not only because I had a sister that passed away in 2007 from Lupus and Cancer but also because I have been living with Lupus since I was 15. To be totally honest, I was diagnosed at 15 (1995) but I had been having symptoms since I was probably around 13 years old. My journey to now has been a long and crazy road but I am still here to tell my tale. I have seen many Lupies (among them my sister) pass away and as a Lupie it is heartbreaking to watch other Lupies go through so much and still press forward. We used to be among the few. Every so often you would hear about someone who passed away that had Lupus but now I hear about it quite often. Maybe it’s the internet or the disease has taken over more lives than it used to in the past…I’m not sure. Either way, I have seen many, many beautiful people suffer because of this ailment.

My story….my journey is like no other quite honestly. I am human…yes, but the story that I have told even up to this point is one of sheer amazement. I don’t know too many people who have lived and continue to live with Lupus like I have. Just by looking at me, I don’t appear to be sick but this is common with most Lupus survivors. On any regular day, we look “normal”, if the word truly exists lol. I used to think to myself, “I wish that I could just be normal.” In fact, my life has been anything but normal and I bet you could say the same. There is no such thing as “normal”. The word in itself is sort of an abomination and should be stricken from dictionaries. There is no such thing as a normal life or normal childhood. Please explain to me….what is normal?? And more importantly, who created that standard?

I used to just want to live like everyone else. Not be told that just because of my diagnosis that I shouldn’t live a certain way. I’ve never wanted to live inside of a box or even be confined to one. Or even be told that I should live my life a certain way. I was in these streets living with Lupus when most people didn’t even know what it was. I was living with Lupus when most didn’t even know that I had been diagnosed. I hated the questions. I hated the presumptions. I hated what this disease had forced upon me. The one thing that I am and will continue to be grateful for is my life. Does that sound basic? I hope that it doesn’t. I’ve known so many whom don’t have one right now. I’ve known some that took and continue to take so much for granted. The simple things are what need to be appreciated because those simple things are what will remain consistent and will allow you to have what you have and keep it!

What do you consider living? Driving a nice car. Living in a nice house. Having money. Being able to do what ever it is that you want to do. Having the freedom to BE whatever it is that you want. There are many of us that get that last one. There are many of us that live a certain way because of what we feel others will think about it or even us. Consider this. Who does your life belong to? I know that many will say “The Lord”, “Jesus”, “God” or whomever you choose to worship. We can only assume that we only get one…life that is. Spend it how you wish, but please overstand that life experience and legacy are important parts of life. Being able to pass knowledge, wisdom and a running start to my son is what is important to me. I choose to worship my mind and body because these are the vessels that I have been given to complete my journey.

I say all of that to say this….without taking care of the body and mind, you can doom yourself for sure. I stopped ingesting pork years before I decided to become a Pescatarian of sorts. Back in 2004, I started having issues with milk. Talking to doctors didn’t help because it seemed like they didn’t care. Most African’s living in America are lactose intolerant and don’t even know it. Why? I didn’t know then and I’m really sure now but I made a change from drinking whole milk to 2% milk. This worked for a brief period of time and then the cramps came back. Why does it make sense that a cows milk would be good for humans? Those darn TV ads had all of us fooled as kids lol.

Ultimately, I stopped drinking milk and started dabbling with almond milk, goats milk and other types of milk that wouldn’t make me feel bad on the inside. My nails still grow (stronger than ever really). My hair and skin still look beautiful and I’ve only broken one bone my entire life and my son blames that on the dog lol. It wasn’t really his fault but he was being a bad boy that day.

In January of 2016, I made another drastic decision to change my life because of how I was feeling. I decided to pick up the Pescatarian lifestyle.